Live your beautiful life, baby (December 31, 2022)
In my widow support groups, there's a lot of discussion about coping with the holidays, especially the first one after losing our loved ones. I approached this year's holiday season with some dread, not knowing how I would be able to cope emotionally. Last Christmas, Scott's family came to Baltimore since Scott needed to stay near home to get blood transfusions for his low hemoglobin. We got him a transfusion one morning and then headed to the Airbnb where the family was staying. Scott was often tired after a transfusion, so he took a nap at the house and told us not to wait on him since we had a gingerbread house decorating contest that afternoon. I had been doing mostly OK so far, but as I looked down the dining room table at the couples and families putting together their gingerbread houses, I knew that this was my future, that one day Scott would no longer be with me on Christmas. This realization hit so hard that I wasn't sure if I was up for doing the...