Remembering John (December 12, 2022)

It's been a difficult week. Last Monday, my supervisor John passed away suddenly from complications due to a cancer similar to Scott's cancer. John's passing was difficult because it brought back memories of the grief from the early days of when I lost Scott, and also because of what John meant to me. My work created a forum for people to share stories of John, and here is what I wrote about him:

"As an early career staff member, my first impression of John was that he was an “important sector person” who was somehow able to run a branch, get his PhD, and manage his bike shop(s) all at the same time. I didn’t really get to know him until 2016 when he became my branch supervisor. John saw career opportunities for me that I never envisioned for myself, and he mentored and encouraged me as I developed as a leader. He built a strong and diverse branch leadership team and cultivated a positive environment in which all the groups worked collaboratively with each other. Having grown up in humble circumstances (he once told me that he grew up playing with his buddies in a junkyard outside of Scranton, PA), he was a fierce advocate for opening up high school STEM internship opportunities to students from low-income families.

John also had an important role in my personal life. When my husband Scott was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer in March 2021, we learned that he had a rare cancer that was in the same family of tumors (neuroendocrine tumors, or NETs) as what John had been battling the past 3 years. In the devastating early days after the diagnosis, John immediately reached out to help us identify doctors and shared his experiences with treatments and side effects. Ever the curious researcher, he sent me papers on the latest studies and connected me with patient conferences to learn more about the disease. He gave wise advice on how to cope with the diagnosis with courage and advised us to not let the disease rob us of the goodness in our lives. That advice helped me numerous times in the months that followed.

Having a rare disease can be extremely isolating because so few people can relate to the experience. Having John in our lives helped us feel less alone on our cancer journey, and he called Scott his “NET brother.” In Scott’s final days in the hospital, John came by and brought a box of Rheb’s chocolates for him. Scott had not wanted any solid food for 3 days, but he perked up when he saw the chocolates and ate 2 of them right away. That moment of joy that he gave Scott in his final days is something I will always remember and treasure.

After Scott passed away in May, John continued to be a source of support and encouragement for me. When I was trying to decide when to return to work, he told me that grief comes in waves at unexpected times and to give myself time to recover first. Once I felt ready to come back to work, I stopped by John’s office, gave him a hug, and told him how much I respected and looked up to him, both as a leader and a person. Looking back, I’m grateful that I had a chance to tell him what he meant to me. Nearly every person I spoke with today had a story of a time that John helped them out in some way; he had a tremendous and irrepressible heart. Many people know him for his loud booming laugh that could travel down multiple hallways, but I also loved the quiet chuckle he sometimes made after making a joke.

It still feels surreal that John is gone. With all of the accomplishments in his professional life, he viewed the branch as his legacy. He was a key figure in the formative years of so many people working here, including myself. The culture he created in the branch is still very much with us, and I believe it will continue to live on through us."