June 14, 2022

 

It was so wonderful to see and hear from people at Scott's celebration of life service on Sunday. I think all the stories and love would have meant so much to him. Here is my remembrance of Scott from the service:

Hello. For those who don't know me, I'm Scott's wife, Bessie Yang Lewis. Thank you so much for coming here today to remember him and celebrate his life with our family.

Scott once told me that he wanted to be remembered for dying tragically rescuing his family from the wreckage of a destroyed sinking battleship, which is an epitaph from one of his favorite movies, The Royal Tenenbaums. While that is not what ended up happening, I wanted to share my thoughts on Scott's life, and what he has meant to me.

I met Scott on the first day of freshman orientation at Georgia Tech. I was 17, and he was 18. My initial impression of him was that he was smart and funny and mischievous. We were assigned to the same project team to research the history of the Ramblin' Wreck of Georgia Tech. As a new college student I took this assignment very seriously; he did not take it seriously at all which in hindsight was the correct amount of seriousness. Our team met at the library to work on the project. Scott was cracking jokes and I said something along the lines of "We should get to work" and turned around to head into the elevator. Just then I felt a tap on my bottom that propelled me forward - I turned around and realized he had kicked me in the butt! Contrary to what Scott might have told you, that was NOT why I fell in love with him later on. I looked very scandalized and he apologized and then we went to work on the class project. Looking back, that project was completely pointless, but I'm glad that it brought us together.

Later that year, I was taking an Intro to Programming class and ran into Scott outside the bookstore. The software was expensive, and Scott offered to bring his TurboPascal disks to my dorm room and install them on my computer. The evening that we arranged to meet, it was pouring rain. Scott ran the 15 minutes it took to get from West Campus where he lived to East Campus where I lived and showed up at my door completely soaking wet, except for the TurboPascal disks which were carefully folded into his pullover. We chatted briefly while he installed the software and then he ran back out into the rain. As I said goodbye to him, I thought, "Scott is a nice guy."

We began dating at the beginning of our sophomore year. Scott was my first boyfriend and I was extremely clueless about dating, but he was always patient and loving with me, then and throughout our relationship. He took me to his house to meet his parents and brothers and I saw right away that he belonged to a close and loving family.

For the sake of time I won't go over the rest of our 26 year relationship, other than to share what Scott has meant to me. Scott used to say that all marriages are a mystery when observed from the outside. I don't want to give the impression that we had a perfect marriage - there were times when we frustrated each other or hurt each other's feelings, and we had our share of struggles. But those struggles made our bond stronger over time, and our love grew with each passing year. No matter what happened, we could always turn to each other, talk with each other, and seek comfort from one another. The cancer was brutal and relentless, but it never defined who he was and it could never touch our love. Shortly after his diagnosis, when we were reeling from the shock of it all, Scott took my hands and looked into my eyes and said, "No matter what happens, THIS has been a tremendous success." And he was right.

Scott always supported me and believed in me in all my endeavors, and this gave me great strength. I was always learning something from him, and he was always fun to talk to and be around. He was a fantastic travel companion on our adventures around the world, and when the pandemic hit, we spent a year in lockdown and enjoyed every day that we could be together at home. He often told me that I looked beautiful. While I never considered myself beautiful by the standards of the world, I could see that he meant it each time he said it, and that made me feel beautiful. Because of him, I know what true love is, and I will always be grateful that he shared his life with me.

Scott also embraced my family and became what my uncle deemed "the sweetheart of the family." He was a wonderful big brother to my sisters ever since they were kids and a loving son to my parents. In an unexpected twist, he became my Mom’s partner in crime, as she is also a little mischievous. While he was in the hospital, I told Scott that I thought he was destined to become part of my family. He thought about it and said, "I don't believe in destiny, but I also kind of think you're right."

My sister Vicki recently commented, "I didn't know that I loved Scott this hard." And while we all knew that we loved Scott tremendously, I think many of us are grappling with this right now.

I want to recognize and thank his parents Randy and June, who raised a true gentleman, a truly good and kind man. They have demonstrated an incredible love for Scott throughout his life and they have also welcomed me and my family as their own from the beginning. The same is true of his brothers Eric and Todd. I want you to know that I will always be here for you.

I also want to thank our extended family, friends, and colleagues, some of whom have traveled from all over the country to be here today to celebrate his memory, and everyone who reached out and sent messages of love and hope and encouragement to Scott and me throughout our cancer journey. Scott fought to the end courageously and spent his final days telling his family and friends how much he loved them and how grateful he was for all of you.

I also want to say how proud I am of what Scott accomplished in his life. He directed his creative passion and energy toward making games, some of which were played by millions of people around the world. Later in his career, he made the leap into teaching, which took no small amount of courage. It was the most challenging job he ever took on, but he was deeply committed to it and to his students. Just over a year ago, Scott was here at St Paul's attending their high school graduation ceremony. He had just been released from the hospital, after suffering debilitating neck pain as a side effect of radiation treatments. Shortly after coming home, he told me of his desire to attend graduation. I was opposed to the idea at first because I thought it would be too much of a physical strain on him. But he was adamant, and so we came up with a way to make it work. St Paul's allowed us to bring a chair that would support his neck throughout the ceremony, and while it took every bit of strength he had, he was able to be there for his students which was so important to him.

A few days after Scott passed away, while I was taking an evening walk, I saw a small child standing outside her house and thought, "her story is just beginning." And this made me sad as I realized that Scott's story on Earth had come to an end. But then I wondered if maybe his story wasn't over yet, and his influence can live on in us. Scott was dedicated to helping young people, and making the world a better place, and deeply loving the people around him. He made me a better person and inspired me to follow his example and support what was important to him, and I hope others will do the same. One of his former St Paul’s students, now studying computer science in college, wrote to me that what he appreciated most about Scott were the many life lessons he gave, the simplest yet most important being to do what you love and to always, always spread joy.

In the final days of his life, when his brother Todd asked him what he was most proud of, Scott said that it was his students, and being able to see them grow and them knowing that he cared about them. So I am glad that we can be here today to remember him in this place that he loved, with the people whom he loved and who love him still.

Thank you.